- Leviticus 20:22-22:16
- Mark 9:1-29
- Psalm 43:1-5
- Proverbs 10:18
Y’all, I must admit I don’t even know how to approach any of today’s readings. In Leviticus, we read the rules and regulations regarding priests cleanliness. I can’t even begin to relate to these laws, they make no sense to me. I’ve studied them and I know them. Mostly, I know that Jesus came to be the final sacrifice so we no longer have to bring lambs and birds and oxen over and over again. He paid the ultimate sacrifice. Thank you Lord!
In Mark, we learn about miracles of healing. The closest I can come is my experience with pregnancies.
Jeff and I have 2 daughters, as you may know or have read in my bio. But what I haven’t shared is that I have 4 babies in heaven. These babies were miscarried or died in utero at about 10 weeks. My body didn’t do pregnancy well. Two of the babies that died in utero, had to be surgically cleaned out. Someday I’ll write about the heart wrenching pain of miscarriage, but not today. Today, is the miracle of the two that God leant me to raise up.
I had already had 1 miscarriage when I got pregnant with Ashley, and my body just didn’t know what to do. Ashley is a miracle baby because my body threatened miscarriage with her SIX DIFFERENT TIMES. The doctor just kept putting me to bed for a week at a time, which my body and baby seemed to like because she hung out with me. By the time she got here, I was so grateful to hold her….WE MADE IT, baby! WE MADE IT! I held her skin to skin in that hospital bed and cried. We made it baby girl! If we can survive that, we can do anything! She’s my miracle baby.
By the time I got pregnant with Dakota I had three miscarriages. I was a emotional basket case!! *sigh, my poor husband, sigh* I had a diagnosed hormone imbalance and was in the high risk category under a doctors care. The doctors put me on hormones to try and balance my body out, and our circle group fervently prayed over us before & during pregnancy. When she was finally conceived, Jeff and I were elated! The first time I got morning sickness, I celebrated, because that meant my body was doing what it was supposed to be doing, keeping baby safe n’ sound! THENNNN the tests showed that she could possibly be down’s syndrome and all kinds of flags and warnings went up. I didn’t care, she would be a miracle either way. And she is.
These are proof enough that Jesus does really heal in the way that I want Him to sometimes, and my babies in heaven….well, I know that I’ll get to meet them someday. My heavenly babies, all have names. I named them as a way of releasing grief. That’s another story I’ll write some day….not today.
When I first read this verse, this morning, it felt like a scolding. But after journaling, I don’t think it is. In my prayerful imagination, Jesus and I are sitting on a rock by the water, criss-cross applesauce, like in preschool, and he’s looking at me in the eye, as I cry asking in a loving way as I lay my head on his shoulder. How long shall I stay with you, Theresa? Those words “put up with” can be translated “hold up” or “suffer”. So Jesus, for today, is asking me how long do you need held up? How long will you suffer with this unbelief? Remember THESE miracles!!
Many times my faith wanes, and I can sense that Jesus gets impatient with me. But not today, or at least not at this moment. Today I sit with the memories of the miracles in my life, still feeling the moment that I heard the heartbeat of my little girls and believe.
Lord, thank you for the miracle of my family. You took two broken people and brought forth miracles of life through them. You Lord have held together this family, and for that I am forever grateful. Lord, I believe that you still perform miracles. And Lord, help me when I don’t believe, ok? Be patient with me, again. I pray for miracles in the life of the person reading this. I pray that you are patient with them and help them to see the only NECESSARY miracle and that is that you came and died for us, were raised again and seated at the right hand of the Father. Secure our hope in that.
Are you needing prayer today?
What miracles have you seen?