Asking for Help

Deuteronomy 16:1-17:20

Luke 9:7-27

Psalm 72:1-20

Proverbs 12:8-9

Better to be a nobody and yet have a servant than to pretend to be a somebody and have no food.

Proverbs 12:9

Last year I participated in a program called My Transphormation Starts Today! Its a weight loss & fitness program. The company is called 1st Phorm and they also sell weight loss and health supplements. There’s a million companies like it, I chose this one because it was recommended to me by a friend. It works as an app and when you sign up, they assign you an advisor, who is an accountability coach that checks in with you each week. Its only like $48.00 per year, which is cheap comparatively speaking and how they make their money is with supplements, but they don’t “push” them on you. Its the accountability that works for many people, like me. They believe in hard work and the science of food. It really worked for me.

I recommended it to a few friends of mine and a few of us were going to work the program together. I was excited for our little local group. But it seemed that no one else in the group was taking it as seriously as I was, and I felt discouraged, like I failed my friends somehow. This was the first of my “falling off the wagon”. Then the political climate and stress moved me towards checking out of social media and I lost track of the online MTST group. All this together, has created a weight gain that I feel totally ashamed of.

Pride.

Ugh.

I don’t tell this story for you to feel sorry for me, I do it as an illustration for the Proverb. See, I want to get “back on the program” but I feel ashamed to reach out to my advisor. I had goals and plans, and I fell off the wagon. So instead of asking for help I am “pretending” that everything is ok, and I don’t need help. I am being prideful in reaching out.

I used to tell my kids when they were in school to ask for help, if they didn’t understand a particular subject. Stay after school for extra help, raise your hand and ask for clarification, go to the teacher during study hall or go to a different teacher if they thought it would help. Worst case scenario, ask me for help! God knows, I’d try, but surely there’s someone smarter!! Sometimes they would, but sometimes they wouldn’t. Its embarrassing to be the kid who raises their hand, I think. So often times we go around pretending to have it under control, to pretend to “be somebody”.

But isn’t that really just called PRIDE?

And isn’t PRIDE actually one of the seven deadly sins?

Oh SNAP! There it is.

Yes, it is. This kind of pride is a sin. But why? Isn’t it ok to be proud of yourself when you accomplish something? Yes. Yes it is. When I was successful in weight loss last year, I felt so much pride because I was able to run longer, lift heavier, feel happier. I felt proud of myself emotionally and I felt healthier. Which REALLY is the end game goal. Right?

But the kind of pride that we feel which causes us to feel ashamed to ask for help….that’s a different kind of pride. That’s PRETENDING to be something we’re not. Which is actually separating us from community and isolating ourselves. Its causing us to “have no food“.

Say you’re a woman who’s been a stay at home mom for several years and decide to return to college. This semester you’re taking statistics. Your professor says, don’t use a calculator, all work must be shown on an excel spreadsheet. But because you’ve been out of the workforce for a while, its been a few years since you’ve used excel. How are you supposed to be successful? Well, you could consider asking a friend for help, someone who might know more about excel and perhaps this friend even offered to get together over a cup of coffee to see if she could help you. If you take this friend up on her cup of coffee, and get some one on one time on excel, then a couple benefits of this are available to you.

  • You get to spend time with a friend, where two or more are gathered in Jesus name, he is with them
  • You get free help, a servant

Better to be a nobody, better to be a beginner, better to swallow our pride and get the help we need AKA have a servant.

Dear Lord, I thank you for the practical application of this Proverb that you put on my heart today. I know thank you that it spoke to me. I pray that you take these words of mine and use them to speak to the person reading this right now. I’m sorry Lord for my pride. I pray for the person reading this right now, that you would speak to their heart and cause them to seek out the help they need today. If there are any chains of pretending, shame, fear or embarrassment, I pray that you would use my writings to break them and return each of us to you.

How can I be praying for you today?

What prideful habit of yours comes to mind with this reading?

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